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 TumblrSite NewsQuarkMaster2013-04-14 18:19

My blog is a bit broken post move, and rather than fix it before my next site redesign, I've decided to blog at Tumblr. Sooooo....come see me at QuarkMaster.Tumblr.Com for more details!

 John Dies At The EndMoviesQuarkMaster2013-01-19 14:33

It's All About The Sauce...Soy Sauce.

Soy Sauce

The title of theis movie is not really a spoiler. I'm not saying that John doesn't die at the end, I'm saying that it's not really clear when the end is, because John and Dave are both on the Sauce. Soy Sauce and so they have a very Zen perspective of time in a highly non-linear manner.

And so, yes, John does die, but that really isn't as much of an impediment as you might think, mainly because John by the end/begining/middle of the movie is probably just a manifestation of the Sauce. There are a lot of those in the movie.

There are a lot of manifestations in this movie: including the meat monster to the right. In fact, battling manifestations is a lot of what John and Dave do.

At some point in the movie, John and Dave are some slackers, John is in a band and Dave is his friend, through interactions with a sauced up alien infested Rastefarian the two of them get introduced to the latest street drug, called Soy Sauce.

Dave didn't choose to get addicted to Sauce, that was the Sauce's work. But once he was addicted, and didn't die, it was clear he, and John were uniquely qualified to save the Earth from certain annihilation. Although not clear that's going to work out well.


Meat Monster

This movie is seriously tripping.

It opens in theaters January 25, 2012, but is currently available to rent online from iTunes or Amazon.

I chose to watch it in advance, at home, where I could alter my perception of the movie. Last night, it made a lot of sense, sort of like a documentary, but admittedly I watched it drinking Absinthe and inhaling something completely legal in Colorado.

Think of this movie as like the Pineapple Express version of Scanners or Naked Lunch. It's gruesome and creepy and very funny. Soy Sauce makes the little pills in the Matrix look like aspirin.

Ok, so today, I find some parts of the movie do not connect as well as they did last night. But it was still a lot of fun, despite the fact that it raised far more questions than it answered. The movie is based on a book by the same name, and there is a sequel and will probably be a third. I am hyping the movie to get people to see it so they'll make the sequels so I can get more answers.

However, I already know that extra movies will only create extra questions.

The only person that can answer these questions is probably Dr. Marconi (below). Dave tries to explain things to a reporter (Paul Giamati) but has some issues getting his point across, thwarted by the various forces of darkness.

And boy are there a lot of different forces of darkness.

The movie is brought to us by Don Coscarelli who brought us the legendary Bubba Hotep, Phantasm and The Beast Master. All of which, I assume everyone has seen.

Paul Giameti (Sideways: first person to take a true stand against Merlot!) is the executive producer and plays the character who is the focus of Dave's narration of the movie.

Dr. Marconi is played by Clancy Brown, who does voice work for about every animated show currently on television, and has been in a number of SF movies.

Glynn Turman is the detective who's tracking the Soy Sauce and the alien invaders from an alternate dimension is fantastic. Currently he's known for playing Marty Kaan's father on House of Lies (an extremely accurate documentary on Business Consultants currently running on Showtime)

John and Dave, our heroes, are played by Chase Williams and Rob Mayes, both relatively new, and totally sexy. They're really the best looking parts of the movie, most everything else is creepy.

Warning: Do NOT pirate this movie, there have been some very serious side effects to people who pirated this movie:

Dr. Marconi
 Werewolf: The Beast Among UsMoviesQuarkMaster2013-01-07 22:12
Werewolf: The Beast Among Us
A new werewolf movie is among us.

Really no clue where this one came from, but it's fairly new in stores and rental releases, and it's suprisingly good as direct to DVD werewolf movies go.

First, it's no Dog Soldiers which is like a werwolf's who's who of BBC television personalities including: Sean Pertwee (son of the third Doctor), Kevin McKidd (HBO's Rome, Journeyman, Grey's Anatomy, Percy Jackson), Liam Cunnigham (Game of Thrones--Ser Davos Seaworth, Outcasts), Dorren Morfit,  Craig Conway, Emma Cleasby, etc.

However, in the line up of "Van Helsing" wanna-be, grade-B movies, it's not bad.  I mean, if I look at the trailers for the upcoming major release "Hansel and Gretel" movie, they look very similar.  In fact at first I couldn't remember that a preview I saw this fall was for "Hansel and Gretel" and I thought maybe this was the movie I saw the preview for.

It does, interestingly, star the former Director of Global Dynamix (located in Eureka on the SyFy channel)--Ed Quinn (big hat in picture) and Nia Peeples, Steven Bauer and several other BBC like people.   It's like half Brit/half American.  It was filmed however, in Transylvania near Wallachia, which is probably why the set design is amazingly believable.

Basic storyline is that we have a village in the 19th century (??) beset by a super nasty werewolf, who's going around making verclaws as well as baby werewolfs.  Verclaws are sort of like zombie-werewolves, where the bitten died and turned into werwolf-zombies or something, vs turned into werewolves...at least in this movie.

In any event, an intrepid team of seasoned Werewolf Hunters happens through and vies with local hoodwinks and roughnecks to capture and kill this "no ordinary werewolf."

A young lad in the village, who is studying medicine with the local doctor and who's been studying the victims, and pining for the daughter of the richest man in town (who likes to shoot at him), offers to join the team to lend them his aid and expertise.

Naturally, the kid (and villagers) eventually figure out that the super/intelligent werewolf is someone they know, the question is who?  And can they stop it?

Review:  For direct to DVD it really looks good overall. They use a combination of animatronics and CGI for the werewolf, and really, it's pretty good particularly since you do get good looks at the werewolf.   
As far as predictability, well, most people wouldn't find it predictable, unless they're the sort of person that would visit this site.   QM Gallery visitors will have a good time figuring it all out, and, I think, be happy with the ending.

Also, please note: I do not recommend Chacutrie with this movie. Nor Spaghetti....
[Expand]I Broke My BlogSite NewsQuarkMaster2013-01-07 21:24

I broke my blog...

OK, so end of last year, I decided to up and move my site to a new server/host.  For the last 5 or 6 years I've had a dedicated server at a hosting facility somewhere...Actually, only one where, Server Beach...and that server was a Dell PowerEdge 440 which probably around end of 2011, I was told was no longer supported by SB, so if anything on it died, they couldn't repair it.  Time to upgrade.

However, that's a big hassle and I couldn't get a good price/performance ratio out of them for anything like the same cost (they were eaten by Peer 1 after I signed up) so I put it off.  Finally got paranoid enough to move to a new server at a new hosting provider:  Razor Servers.  And I slowly moved stuff over and ran for a couple months in parallel.  Finally killed of SB last week, Friday.

New server is actually about same price, but a lot hunkier, all Windows 2012, reasonable RAM and procs,  I've plopped a nice little VM on it for my remote workstation.  It's always good to have a workstation that's outside your normal environment that you can jump on to back test reality.  I.e. "Is it me or is the Internet/Nifty/Google/Microsoft/etc down." 

Plus implemented a backup mail server on my main one, for days when my mail server's down.  Or one of my clients is (because oddly NYC didn't have power for like a week, a while back...can you believe that?)

Anyway, in the course of that.  I broke my blog.    The buttons don't work no more.

It's because this hodgepodge website is an amalgam of ancient ASP code and more recent (but old) ASP.Net code, and it's compiled under a very old version of asp.net and who knows...I need to recompile it and get the extra binaries out there and yada yada yada it's a pain in the ass.

Particularly because I keep wanting to update the entire site.  So right now I'm toying with a new site design, and in fact just moving the mechanism to say, DotNetNuke which takes care of most of the programming for me, so I don't have to mess.   And I can certainly do that, but then I have the artistic challenge of "what should it look like"  I like the basic theme, can I replicate it?  Ehh, not liking, you get the idea....going in circles.

Then there is porting all the content to the new system, I've done a few failed attempts at this before, can't seem to get enough time to just get it done, before I decide it's not worth the effort.

Not to mention, I do have this big Story Collection that I want to finish cleaning and posting, this is other people's stories I've collected.   But then there is the author notification/request removal business and again, I run out of time.

Anyway, so I thought I'd update those of you who visit on why not much happens, I keep losing track of time.

So aside from the mechanics of the website where am I?
  • Working on a novel that I am thinking about e-publishing on Amazon etc.  I just gotta get that done, and I feel the need for far better editing and review/rewriting for something I charge money for.  But it's going....this is a "sort of" werewolf/coming out story, set 300+ years in the future.
  • Only minimal work has been done lately on my other novel AKA Andy, which is a Slave Future/ASFR story, that I debate e-publishing vs web posting.
  • I actually did do some writing in 2012 on the long delayed Damned To Hell Novel, The Incubus, that I keep promising over there.  That novel will probably just be web published, because 1) I said it would be when I started, and 2) it's got too much sex and perversion for general public consumption.
  • Satyrcation is not that far from complete, it's a Satyr and Nymph TF story, with lots of sex of all types.  Definitely a web story.
  • I have a Hobbit TF video I started working on ages ago to go with the release of the Hobbit, yeah, that got done on time.  Actually the TF is rigged except for animating the hair growth, which has been stumping me on the best way to do that.  I need to grow lots of hair on the feet (and elsewhere).  There are many ways to do it, some more a pain than others, some look better than others.
  • Plus, I was working on another Space Alient (Texaco) normal image story, that got derailed by lighting issues in one scene and I just didn't get back to it, but I still intend to.
I hope to have some more time in the next few months.  The last year I was just too bogged down with work....
 Return of Teen WolfTVQuarkMaster2012-06-10 13:04
 The Return of Teen Wolf, Season 2 :

OK, yes:

1) It's on MTV, home of the most horrifying TV monster ever envisioned: Snookie.
2) It's for teens, young adults.
3) Officially it's girl bait.

But I point out that 2 & 3 qualify it for the Gay Male Demographic as surely as the term "CW"

I loved last season, and this season is even more Decoteau'ian (meaning David Decoteau's wet dream).

I love werewolves.  If done right, they're far more interesting than vampires since there tends to be more emotional struggle between man and beast.

And if you are on this website, you know I like naked, or semi-naked young males who tear their clothes off and transform into beasts and monsters.

So how could I not love this show.  The ratio of male to female semi-nudity is about 5-1.  Which is finally, what I want to see on MTV.  (OK, I'd love to see Music Videos, but that's just asking too much for something called "Music Tele Vision")

To the right is a partial cast, basically the original characters.  There are newer cast photos with Jackson in them, who I talk about below.

The hero (above and right center) is Scott, the "Teen Wolf" his best friend Stiles (the son of the local sheriff) who provides the comic sidekick role, and who has yet to really strip, but we've been promised he'll strip this season.  Scott is shirtless about 1/3 of the time.  

Stiles was my favorite character in Season 1.  I really wish he'd get bit, but so far, no go.  I'd be happy with him stripping down though.  He's the geeky brains, Scott is the average kid, with gorgeous looks, who becomes a LaCrosse star after wolfing out.


  The red head, is, initially Queen Bitch, but she gets bit by the end and well, something freaky happens to her, not at all sure she ends up as a werewolf...maybe were something else...that's the plot right now.

Scott's girlfriend, below, is Allison Argent, who unfortunately, we find out is the daughter of a long line of werewolf hunters.  

OK, so a bit Capulet and Montegue...she has some underwear scenes too, but don't really remember them.

Now of course you can scream about the light makeup below, but that's explained, via other WW's that 1) there are different states of wolfiness and 2) the longer you are a WW, the more powerful you become and the more wolf like you become.  The season 1 Alpha was super werwolfy.

Scott is supposed to get more wolfy this season.
   In addition to the star, Tyler Posey (above) we also have the insanely gorgeous Colton Haynes playing super-asshole Jackson (sides).

This is his second run at werewolves, after The Gates where he was a super stud werewolf, here he's a wanna-be wolf.  He wants to be a wolf so bad he will do about anything.  (See last season)

He's a huge asshole, but in the second half of the season premiere he's so excited about turning into a werewolf that he borrows a video camera and tripod and strips nearly naked in his bedroom to film it.

I have come to love him in the show because even though he's about everything I hate, and definitely the sort that would be victimized at the NCMC, he's got a buried level of need/anxiety at his core that every now and then shows through his asshole persona.  Clearly a mask of unresolved issues of some sort, but manifesting in a clear need to be "different" to be something other than the rich jock stud with a Porsche and a perfect body.

If only I'd had those kind of problems in High School.

I will note that there is an openly gay player on the team, so far a pretty minor character with a few lines every third episode.  Hopefully we'll "see" more of him in multiple ways.  He is Jackson's best friend, and given Jackson's rather weird relationship with girls and in particular his ex, Lydia (the red head).  He's really not that in to girls except as a prop.

We have a new wolf boy this season, sort of  coming out of nowhere, (well, we meet him digging graves for last season's dead people) he's the son of the local undertaker, a geek and nerd (yet still on the Lacrosse team, oddly enough) who is from a very abusive home, where is father basically tortures him and likes to lock him up in the basement.  
Right:  You know you've wolfed it out when you have to go to a Vet to get patched up.  (Scott works for the Vet, who has some secrets of his own).

To be clear, this is NOT Michael J Fox's teen wolf.  Yes there is humor, but there is a lot of dramatic tension with wolf hunters and wolf pack dynamics and unknown other types of monsters.  So kind of a soapier, sexier, Buffy light, but given time it is working heavily on mythology, it's just got a lot of sex they have to show to keep the teens (and me) horny.
 PrometheusMoviesQuarkMaster2012-06-09 20:08
 Ridley Scott's Prometheus

Just came back from Prometheus, way better than expected.  It was a very nice return to his SF universe and style.   Alien was possibly better, but then that took me by surprise and thus, particularly for its time, I feel it was more original.

This felt like a "return" but not a "retread" because it is definitely different, but it feels like the Alien universe, which it is.  So it's a really fresh return to the style of those movies.  

Alien was scarier, but once you've lived through an "Alien" attack (4 times) you get inured.  So even though they aren't battling "Aliens" with a capital "A" it is the same "universe" and Ridley Scott, so you sort of know what you are going to get:

  • Untrustworthy synthetic beings, a "robot" in this movie, who are possibly up to no good.
  • Mega corporations with unethical plans that make life difficult for the "good guys"
  • Hard core, gritty Science Fiction, particularly in a visual sense.
  • Lots of:
    • Slime
    • Blood
    • Goo
    • Slime-Blood-Goo Explosions
  • Tentacle/Worm kinky icky stuff particularly down the mouth.
  • Creepy alien pregnancies.
  • People mutating to death (or "otherness") in very painful manners.
  • Betrayal, Greed.
  • Really bad stomach aches.
  • Malevolent aliens (with a small a).
  • One Kick Ass Bitch that lives.
Hopefully it's not spoiling anything to say that the heroine, Dr. Shaw, survives despite all of the above.  She kicks some ass, including operating on herself to remove something.  I'm thinking she'd studied historical Ridley Scott movies and so knew what to do when the time was right.

This movie was much more thoughtful than Alien, quite a bit deeper, and in someway perhaps more satisfying.  So it's more high brow, but still lots of action, subterfuge, creepy hallways, space suites, spaceshipts etc designed by HR Giger.

As you might expect, this film is a must for Giger fans, it almost seems even stronger than Alien (for which he did the design).  There's an acknowledgement to him in the credits, but he didn't actually work on it as far as I can see at IMDB.

If the Alien(s) movies were Horror movies, this is more like a really gory "Mystery" i.e. what is this shit, and what were these big white humanoids up to?  

I saw the IMAX 3D version, super.  Oddly, the 3D was well done, not some afterthought.  However, this is one of the very few IMAX 3D movies that you can forget is in 3D.  Where the 3D enhances the overall experience but doesn't over power.  As far as 3D goes, this is probably the best 3D movie since Avatar.  It's very good and blends well with the story.  You feel like you are physically present, but it doesn't "jump out" at you (well...usually doesn't jump out at you)

So if you liked any of the Alien movies, you definitely need to see this.  And if you haven't, but like good SF, than go see this.  Or if you just like genetic engineering and mutation, go see it.

 BTW Forgot to tell you to go see Cabin in the WoodsMoviesQuarkMaster2012-06-08 01:06
Just realized that I never got on and blogged to you about why you must see Cabin in the Woods.

You just need to go see it.

Yes, I think you've seen this sort of movie before.

And yes, maybe you know from the trailers that there is a twist.

But really?  No, the trailer's apparent twist on the old, old, old story is not the "twist."

I won't tell you what happens.

But it is the BEST ending to any horror story ever told.  Balthazar nearly wept for joy.  Of course that would be impossible, maybe steamed out his eyes for joy but...you get the idea.

If you can, go see it, otherwise.  You must rent it.

It really isn't what you think, even when you think you know what is happening.

[Expand]Captcha/UpdatesSite NewsQuarkMaster2012-06-08 00:55

Long time no blog.

Can't believe we are closing in on a year since my last blog post and like 9 months since the last Apprentice in Hell.  Really need to whip Balthazar in to getting more work done, but I'm afraid to do that, because he will whip me back...

From the Home page Texaco image, you can guess that the aliens are up to their old tricks.  I'd hoped to be long done with that now, but about 33% of the way in I ended up with a scene with some horrific lighting (lots of lamps) and trying to get it to work right took tons of time, and then got sucked into a very busy period with my day job; so haven't finished it yet.

I'm also working on a new animated TF sequence sort of a "Sorcerer's Apprentice" type thing (but not related to my Apprentice images which was part of Changes).  That's about 75% done.  I basically need more work on hair growth, trying to get that to work.  Once that's done, it's just raw CPU power to render it.

Even a very short animation is several hundred images, and those take quite a bit of time.  My "render farm" so to speak is only about 4 machines (all x64, 4 to 8 cores/machine and anywhere form 8 to 32 Gig of RAM).
Very primitive for animation work, but it eventually gets done.  This is, after all, just a hobby so I work with what's sitting around my house.

I've done more work on Satyrcation a text story, it's about 75% done.  Just need to wrap it up already.
Spent a lot of time working on "The Incubus" which I started writing, I don't know how many centuries ago, but it's coming a long, but it is sort of never ending.

There is another ASFR long story I am working on, but I might actually try self publishing it.  It's a bit more Science Fictiony than pure porn.  Yes, lots of sex, lots of fetish, but not as blatant as other stuff.

I also have about half of Toi Story II, a.k.a. "Return To The Island of Dr. Monroe" plotted out.  It will involve some Slave Handler training.  No idea when I'll get to that, I have to finish at least a couple of the other text stories first.

So, been having trouble with robo-spammers adding junk comments to the site.
In order to really address this one needs a truly dynamic "captcha" control.  One of those "type the random, impossible to read letters."  I have the technology to do it, and could easily do it in the blog area, but the images area is pretty old and I'd need to upgrade that to do it.

So for now, I've invented a super cheesy sort of captcha mechanism that you need to follow to add comments to pictures and stories.

Need to run for now.  Hopefully some posts this summer!


 Return to HellSite NewsQuarkMaster2011-07-25 21:05
Short Post so Balthazar's followers may know despair! (wouldn't want them to have any hope after all)

At long last I have finally restarted working on Apprentice in Hell Episode 3...I am going to be "Hell Bent" on getting it done this time.

This is where the transformations begin.  Lots of fun and games.  Again, some sick stuff.  Some gainer stuff.

I've got some really kinky TF's in the works (always had for this one)...the biggest problem is there are 5 apprentices and thus 5 TF's.
That takes quite a bit of time and its a lot of images...may have to break it up...but I hope not....

Speaking of hellish stuff...fun and games coming with Death Valley on MTV late August.  Basically "COPS" with undead perps.

Teen Wolf is cheesy teen soap, but werewolves and lots of hot shirtless young men.  So the eye candy alone is worth it...

MTV is doing it these days, best stuff I've seen on that network since the day the Music Video died.  

RJ Berger (teen sex comedy about a lad with a ginormous endowment--and the most fucked up adults on TV)
Teen Wolf  
Death Valley
Awkward (OK...totally girly but fun)

Of course over at HBO: True Blood is going overtime on the crazy fun...

Loved it when super shirtless (and sometimes nude) Jason was kidnapped and mauled by a were panther couple who wanted to "turn him" and make him their were panther sperm donor.
For their whole inbred clan...he was then gang raped by a bunch of were panther bitches (or whatever cat women are called).

Then of course crazy witches and the Super Brujo and rotting Pam, "Nice Eric" and King (True Death for You) Bill (who is sleeping with his great-great-grand daughter).  

And looks like some good upcoming werewolf pack battles for Alcide and the local alpha.

Oh and Sam and his brother are having lots of fun and spend lots of time taking their clothes off.  

And those creepy Fairies under Queen Maub are clearly up to no good....

Oh, and yeah the super creepy possessed baby and the extra possessed doll from hell

 2 ASFR's in One DayMoviesQuarkMaster2011-04-03 18:23
 Maybe I should have done this first post to let the more "surprsing" ASFR find of Astro Boy keep top Blog Post...but really just got to thinking of it.   Wrote AB first, because it was very clearly ASFR. (a robot boy after all)

Not to spoil anything, but if you like mind game movie thrillers; and if you like ASFR, and you like alternate universe theories....then go see "The Source Code"  I have already given too much away.

It's not the visual spectacle of Inception, but it's possibly even more spinetinglingly thought provoking with morally ambiguous government types.

It's very well reviewed, but many critics have said the mechanism doesn't make any sense; but as a physicist, I can say that the fundamental theoretical science of what they are doing (or at least what is really happening) is fine; the engineering of it is questionable, but no more so than the existence of warp drive....

So from a Quantum Field Theory point of view, the movie makes complete sense...we just aren't anywhere near the tech level to do it...
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